


Wake Up in the Bed You Made

by killabeez



Category: Haven - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Future Fic, M/M, Multi, Polyamory, Threesome - F/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-06
Updated: 2013-09-06
Packaged: 2017-12-25 19:08:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/956630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killabeez/pseuds/killabeez
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's weird. It's good weird, but it's weird. She should have seen that coming.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wake Up in the Bed You Made

**Author's Note:**

  * For [queenmidalah](https://archiveofourown.org/users/queenmidalah/gifts).



> Thanks to an overabundance of life events, I had to choose whether to post an abbreviated and unfinished version of this story before the deadline, or to default on the challenge. My sincere apologies to queenmidalah for the delay, and I've just added the first half of the story which was originally left off.

It's been a year since the Hunter meteor storm rained fire and death out of the sky. What penance had to be paid, Audrey's paid it. Haven is free from its curse. The Troubled are no longer troubled—they can get on with living their lives like everyone else in the world. They'll suffer the same mundane problems, deal with the same everyday luck that most people do, good and bad, the same random twists of Fate. Duke won't have to kill anyone in the name of his family's legacy. Nathan won't need her touch to feel heat, or cold, or pain.

As for Audrey herself, she won't have to wonder any more about who she was. She carries those memories inside her now, even if she doesn't feel like she has the right. Now that it's all over, she remembers being Lexie, Lucy, Sarah, and everyone that went before. She doesn't know how she's supposed to deal with that. She wants to tell Nathan that the woman he sees isn't the same person any more, if she was ever a person at all.

The thing is, though, that when she's around Nathan, she still feels like Audrey Parker. The fake Audrey Parker. The woman she was when they met. Maybe this is what it was like for him—only able to feel like a real person when he was with her.

She gets that now, in a way she didn't before.

On a cold October morning, a year to the day after the meteor storm, she wakes up in her bed like any ordinary woman—which is what everyone keeps telling her she is. All she can say for sure is what she's not. She's not Sarah, or Lucy, or Lexie, or any of the other women whose memories she stole. She's not special, and she's not cursed. She's also not the person who first came to Haven two years ago, believing herself to be Special Agent Audrey Parker.

As for what she _is_ ...that remains to be seen.

_Good morning, Audrey Parker. Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life._

* * *

Duke finds her on the deck in the gray morning light, huddled into her thickest sweater. She expects him to make a crack, but he doesn't, just comes and stands beside her, his hands on the rail. 

They stand there watching the mist rise off the water, the birds fishing in the cove as the sun comes up over the ridge behind them. When she turns toward him without a word, he opens his arms and folds her into him like he knows what she needs better than she does.

Eventually, he says, "You planning on going in to work today? Or you figure saving the world's enough for one week?"

She shrugs, though she makes no move to step away. Duke's hugs are possibly the best thing ever invented.

"You know me. Any excuse to slack off." He makes an 'mmm' noise, but says nothing. She wrinkles her nose. "Actually, I was thinking about a career change."

"About time," he says. "I always knew you were too nice to be a cop." That makes her lips quirk. "Ever given thought to a life of crime?"

"I was thinking more along the lines of astronaut." 

Duke rests his chin on her head and squeezes her a little tighter. She closes her eyes and wishes she could hide there forever. But he finally lets her go, and then she has no choice but to look at him.

He's serious, all teasing aside when he says, "It's not gonna get any easier the longer you push him away."

She smiles and looks down at her hands. "You don't know that."

But, "Yeah," he says. "I do."

A fish jumps. The morning sun catches his scales and shines a bright rainbow back across the water. Audrey watches him splash back into the water and shivers.

"I'm scared," she says.

"I can see that." When she doesn't say anything, he says, "Nathan's so crazy about you he can't see straight. He'd do anything for you. And you know that. So, what are you afraid of?"

She shakes her head and squints up at him, shading her eyes. "It's gonna sound stupid."

"Try me."

Not for the first time, Audrey wishes it wasn't so much harder for her to talk to Nathan than it is to talk to Duke. Why that is, she doesn't know. It would make things a lot easier.

"I'm afraid he's in love with somebody who doesn't exist," she admits, and has to swallow against a sudden ache in her throat. "Maybe someone who never did."

He doesn't laugh at her, or tell her she's being ridiculous. Instead, he nods, and brushes her hair back from her face, an expression in his eyes that makes her wish she'd known him in one of those other lifetimes, when she hadn't yet met Nathan Wuornos. 

He tells her what she already knows. "You keep avoiding him, you're never gonna find out."

* * *

Nathan's at the station, of course, pretending to be busy. His whole face changes when he sees her.

"Hey," she says.

"Hey."

She stops in his office doorway, making an awkward gesture between herself and the vague direction of his desk. "Hope it's okay that I—"

"Of course." He makes a move like he's going to get up for her, then thinks better of it.

She comes in and sits down on the other side of his desk. Hers isn't here any more, of course. It's one more place she doesn't quite fit.

"Quiet around here," she says, half statement, half question.

"I know. So far, a skunk in Mrs. Britnell's crawlspace is the most exciting thing that's happened today." He makes a wry face. "Takes some getting used to."

An awkward silence rears its head, but thankfully, Nathan saves them. "Want to go get some coffee?"

Audrey nods, relieved. "I most definitely would love some coffee. Let's do that."

* * *

"You know, if you need to take a day or two, ease into it, you can," Nathan says on the walk back from Rosemary's. "There's always going to be a job for you in Haven. You know that, right?"

"I don't know." She looks around, indicating the peaceful, orderly street scene, so mundane it looks like a picture book representation of idyllic small-town living. "The way things have been going, we might not even need a police department any more."

"Come on, you know as well as I do, this is temporary. Give people another day or two, the shine will wear off and they'll start rioting in the streets."

"Duke's parking tickets alone," she supplies.

"Exactly. Enjoy the quiet while you can."

Audrey smiles and sips her coffee. As long as she's known Nathan, she's never heard him mention Duke without that particular edge in his voice. Whether he's joking or serious, giving Duke a hard time on general principles, worried about his safety, or genuinely furious with the guy, it's always there. At least she finally has some idea of what's behind it.

Nathan knows that she knows—about him and Duke, that is. About a certain day when they were sixteen that neither of them talk about, but that she now knows colored everything that came after. The Barn showed her a lot of things. 

Why she's thinking of that now, at ten o'clock on a work day, is not something she wants to think about too closely. It's none of her business, not really, and she hasn't told Duke about what she saw. She does wonder, though, why that memory. Why the Barn chose to show her that day in particular—unless it's because she needed to understand the history between them. Duke's family and Nathan's lay entwined at the heart of the curse, and she'd needed both of them to break it; maybe that's why she'd seen what she had. 

Back at the station, she puts that train of thought aside. She listens as Nathan goes over the morning's reports with Dwight, though if any of the local citizens are planning to riot, they're playing it close to the vest. It is, by an order of magnitude, the least eventful day she's experienced since she first came to Haven. 

Late in the afternoon, she catches Nathan on his way back from the water cooler. "Hey, listen," she says as casually as she knows how. "You busy tonight?"

"Busy? No, not really. Why?"

"You want to have dinner with me?"

"Sure," he says, "Dinner sounds good."

"Great," she says like it's no big deal, though her pulse pounding in her ears pegs her for the faker she is.

"Good," he says, sounding like his heart might be doing the same.

"Good, okay, then." 

She gets the hell out of there with her dignity mostly intact, but it's a close thing.

* * *

Admittedly, the whole thing seemed a lot more romantic in her head. A sunset picnic on a beach—the very beach, in fact, where they'd met the Chief on the day she first came to Haven. Sure, it might be late October in Maine, but the day had been mild enough. 

By the time they pull into the beach parking lot and climb out of Nathan's truck, Audrey's beginning to think she might have miscalculated. The wind has picked up, for one thing. Also, it's high tide—which she should have thought about after two years of living in Haven, but the last time she walked on this beach at sunset, it was summer, and the tide schedules were radically different.

Twenty minutes later, she and Nathan are huddling for warmth, the wind soaking cold salt droplets into their faces and through the paper sack in which she's brought their dinner, and she strongly suspects that Nathan is laughing at her.

"Okay," she concedes, "so maybe this wasn't the best idea I ever had."

"It's possible your date planning skills need a little work."

"Who said it was a date?"

"Sunset picnic on a beach," he counters. "Sounds like a date to me."

She glances back toward the dry, warm car, now a vague, distant shape in the gathering mist. "Rain check?"

"Oh, no. I waited a long time for this. No weaseling out now."

She stops and gives him a look. "Weaseling? Seriously?"

"Weasels are serious business."

"I'm gonna pretend I have a clue what you're talking about." A gust of wind whips her hair across her face; she tucks it behind her ear. They trudge on through the wet sand, and despite the less-than-romantic conditions, Audrey has to admit this is still one of her better dates on record.

"So," she says after a while. "Speaking of Duke..."

"Pretty sure we weren't."

"Well, now we are. And I gotta ask... how come you never told me?"

There's a pause, but he doesn't go all beware-no-trespassing on her, which she takes as a good sign. 

"Not exactly something you drop casually into a conversation." 

Which, as she recalls, is pretty much what he said when she asked him about Sarah. "You know, one of these days, that excuse isn't gonna fly."

He has the grace to look guilty. But she doesn't want to talk about James. James is still a raw spot, and one she's not sure she really wants to share with him. All things considered, she'd much rather talk about Duke. 

"Explains a lot, though," she muses.

"What do you mean?"

"I always wondered about you two."

"Funny."

"I'm serious."

Still, he refuses to get riled. "That was a long time ago."

"So you're telling me there's nothing between you. Nothing unresolved."

"I didn't say that." He stops, and she comes to a halt beside him. "Did you really bring me here to talk about Duke?"

"Honestly? No. But now that the subject's come up..."

Nathan gives her a look, one corner of his mouth turning up. "Wow. You really are bad at this dating thing."

Audrey sighs. He's not wrong.

Nathan's eyes falter. "Audrey, listen, can we..."

"What?"

He meets her gaze, and all at once, she feels like the world's worst idiot for screwing this up. Again. 

There's a desperate note in Nathan's voice when he says, "I missed you. And I know we have a lot to talk about, but right now, all I want is to hold you. It's killing me. Can we do this tomorrow?"

Audrey steps toward him, the soggy bag of food dropping to the sand, forgotten. She touches his waist, then kisses him. He smells so good. She tries to make up for all the time they've wasted, all the time _she's_ wasted, in that one kiss, and he seems to be on the same page, because after a startled moment he puts his arms around her and pulls her in close, telling her with his body how badly he wants to be with her.

"Can I take that as a yes?" he asks roughly, when she finally breaks the kiss.

She nods, breathless and warmed down to her toes. "I'm good with that."

They hold hands on the walk back to his truck. When they get there, he helps her in, and she smiles, wistful. "Remember when I slammed your hand in the door?"

"Why, you want a repeat performance?"

"Wasn't planning on it."

He closes the door, more careful now, and climbs in behind the wheel. "Where to?" he asks.

"Doesn't matter," she says, eyes closed as she relives that kiss, holding it close. "Home."

* * *

He takes her back to his place, and she's glad. Duke will still know where she is, but it's better than risking running into him tonight. 

As Nathan turns down the drive, moonlight illuminates the pirate flag sticker on the dash, same place it's been as long as she's known them. It looks like maybe it's been there as long as Nathan's owned the truck. There's a story there, and she'd love to know what it is—but tomorrow for that. 

They go inside, and they kiss, and it's amazing. It's like coming home. It's too good to be true.

Nathan stops for breath and leans his forehead against hers, framing her face with his hands. "What's wrong?"

She breathes out, not quite a laugh. "I keep waiting for the phone to ring."

He pulls his phone out of his pocket and holds it up, silences it, then tosses it across the room to land in a chair, never looking at it. Gentle, but with intent, he strokes her hair back and lets his gaze roam over her face like he's memorizing this moment. His voice is a low growl when he says, "Not getting out of this so easily, Parker."

"Say that again."

"Parker," he says, and slips her shirt over her shoulders. And then, "Audrey," and she makes him stop talking.

* * *

_Good morning, Audrey Parker. Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life._

It's weird. It's good weird, but it's weird. She should have seen that coming.

He wakes up before her, and brings her coffee. At least it isn't pancakes. She's not sure she could look at him with a straight face.

She takes the coffee. "Thanks," she says, and then forgets how to make words. 

"Welcome." There's a smile playing around his lips.

It's just coffee, she tells herself. It's been a constant in their relationship since the second day they knew each other. What's the big deal? He's supposed to be the awkward one in this relationship, not her.

Tell that to her face, which is warm with a blush that won't quit. 

He sits down on the edge of the bed, and she can smell his ridiculously girly shampoo, or body wash, or whatever it is. Her reaction to that smell is like Pavlov's dogs, and even if they end up getting married and having ten kids, she'll go to her grave with that secret.

"So," he starts. 

There's a pause. 

"Was that going somewhere?" she asks at last. "Because I'm gonna need a little more than that."

"Always the smart ass comment with you," he says. But the smile has reached his eyes, and the way he says it sounds a lot more like moonlight and roses than what he actually says.

"Well, yeah." She hides her own smile behind her coffee. "What'd you expect?"

* * *

Unfortunately, she's going to need clothes to face this day, and for that, he's going to have to take her by her apartment. If there's any mercy in the universe, Duke will be out on his boat committing crimes or something.

No such luck. He's outside the Gull carrying trash bags, and sees them pull up. The way he smiles to himself, like he was waiting for this moment the way a man waits for a death blow, makes her feel like absolute crap. It's a measure of how badly he's hurting that he doesn't hold his ground, but disappears around the corner of the building before she gets out of the car.

Nathan sees, too. Audrey's surprised at the genuine regret she sees on his face, but it doesn't make her feel any better. 

His gaze still on the spot where Duke disappeared, he says, "This is never gonna get any easier, is it?"

"Can't get any worse."

"Don't say that. It's Haven." In unison, they say, "Of course it can get worse."

She reaches out and takes his hand.

"Nathan—"

He squeezes her fingers, then lets her go.

"We'll talk later. Go get changed. I'll see you at the station."

* * *

Audrey goes upstairs. She gets in the shower, and thinks about Duke going into the Barn after her. About how his arms felt the morning before. About the way she's seen him look at Nathan since the first day she came to Haven. 

She's not special any more—she doesn't have any special powers. Whatever went wrong between Nathan and Duke, it happened long before she knew them, and she can't magically make it all better. But she can't pretend Duke doesn't exist. None of them would be here if it wasn't for him. There've been times, more than once, when she would have given up and he wouldn't let her. But more than that, he's the one who went against the fate his family laid on him. He's the one who found the key.

She still sneaks out without talking to him, a coward when it comes right down to it. Of the three of them, she's always been the first to run, given the chance.

* * *

At work, it's more of the same: Haven getting back to normal. She and Nathan getting back to normal. 

Painfully normal. Audrey feels like she's fading into the woodwork. "You okay?" Nathan asks about half a dozen times before lunch.

Audrey's not okay. It occurs to her that maybe she'll actually disappear, she feels so transparent and paper-thin. Somewhere, the real Audrey Parker is living her life. So is the real Lucy Ripley. The real Lexie DeWitt. Sarah Vernon, as far as she knows, never even knew she existed.

She's a ghost.

When lunchtime rolls around, she says, as casually as she can manage, "You know, as a matter of fact, I am feeling a little tired today. Maybe you were right about that whole taking it easy thing. Think you can manage without me for the rest of the day?"

Nathan frowns. "Of course. You sure you're all right?"

"Yeah, no, I'm fine. Just need some down time. It's been... a lot to deal with."

He gets up and starts around the desk. "At least let me take you home."

She waves him off, grabbing her jacket, already half out the door. "No, seriously, I'm fine. I'll give you a call later, okay?"

At first, she drives without a destination in mind. Some part of her has the vague idea that she can get in the car and put her foot to the floor and drive away from Haven, never look back. It's not even like she consciously means to do it—her head's too much of a mess to plan that far ahead. She just needs some space, that's all. She needs room to think.

Where she finds herself is both the last place she expected, and so inevitable she feels like she's come full circle. It makes perfect sense that on a cold afternoon in late October, she finds herself standing on the edge of the bluff where she and Nathan first looked for clues about Jonas Lester's disappearance, watching the white-capped waves far below, and thinking how confident she'd been of her place in the world that day. How little she'd known about anything that mattered.

Even now, with winter coming on, it's beautiful up here. Tuwiuwok, the sign reads. _It means Haven,_ Nathan had told her, though like everything else in her life, that hadn't been the whole truth. But it started here, and it should end here. She doesn't even know what she means by that, but she feels better up here for some reason. Like she can finally catch a breath, and stop trying to pretend she knows how to do this. Be this. Live a life, like real people do.

She closes her eyes and holds her arms out, breathing in the smell of the sea.

It's almost dark when they find her. It's Nathan's voice that she hears, though she can't say whether it's the first time he's called out. "She's here!" he yells, and it's the frantic sound in his voice that reaches her and pulls her back from wherever she is.

In a moment he's there, and Duke's with him, and it filters in to her awareness that she's been here for much longer than she realized. She should be freezing, sitting on the ground as she is, but she doesn't really feel it. They pull her to her feet, and she lets them. It's only when Nathan puts his arms around her that she recognizes how warm he is compared to her.

"Audrey," he breathes, holding on to her like she might vanish. "Thank God. What the hell were you thinking?"

"Nathan," she manages.

"Are you okay?" Duke asks. "Are you hurt?"

"I'm fine." She thinks that's actually true, though she has to admit she's a little fuzzy on the details. "What time is it?"

"After five," Duke says. "Were you up here all afternoon?"

"I guess so?"

"You guess so?" Nathan echoes. "I was worried sick." He glances at Duke. "We were, I mean."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."

They're acting like she was going to jump off the edge of the cliff or something, which... okay, she can see that this might look a little weird, but that's ridiculous. She needed to be alone for a while, that's all. 

Nathan grips her shoulders, searching her face. "Audrey, talk to me. What's this about?"

"I'm fine, okay? I swear. I just—"

When she breaks off, there's a long pause. At last Duke says, "You just what?"

"I needed to think, that's all."

"On top of a cliff."

"I guess so."

Duke and Nathan exchange another look, then Duke eyes her, perceptive as always.

"Is this about what you told me the other day?" 

She gives him a fierce, forbidding look. That was supposed to be between the two of them.

He rushes ahead. "Because, look, Audrey—I don't know if you've noticed, but you're not the only one who's still trying to adjust, here. I mean, I kind of got used to having super powers, you know? Much as I complained about it, you gotta admit it did come in handy."

"And also in case you hadn't noticed," adds Nathan, "thanks to you, the Troubles are over. For good. Nobody else has to die in Haven because of some curse laid on us hundreds of years ago. Thanks to you, we all get a chance to start fresh. To live our lives."

Audrey looks between them. She takes a deep breath, then rubs her hands back and forth over her arms, feeling the cold now as she didn't before. "What's your point?"

Exasperation flickers over Nathan's face. "Our point is that you're not alone. We're in this together. So don't—check out on us."

Audrey hugs herself tightly, wishing it were that easy. She glances at Duke. "No matter what I do, somebody's going to get hurt."

"You won't hurt me," he tells her.

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Lie to me. You suck at it, for the record."

"It's true," Nathan says, like it's a confession. "You do kinda suck at it."

"Oh, okay. Gang up on me," says Duke. "But seriously, I'm with Nathan on this one." He reaches out, closing one hand around her arm. "You need to quit scaring the crap out of us."

Nathan's still holding on to her on the other side, and he adds, "We're not letting you go. I told you that. Not after everything. You belong here with us."

Audrey knows when she's outflanked, and she'd have to be an idiot to argue with that. "Speaking of ganging up on people," she says, but she doesn't mean it. She leans into Nathan's side, suddenly tired enough to lie down where she stands. "Can we go home, now?"

"Why do I always go for the difficult ones?" Nathan asks.

"You're asking me?" says Duke. But Nathan's already got his arm around her, and even tired as she is, Audrey hears that something's changed between them. 

It's a long drive back to the Gull, and she has time to think about that. To listen to the quiet shape of something she didn't think they would ever get to, suddenly real and present between the three of them. She'd give almost anything to know exactly what happened between Duke and Nathan in the last few hours, but maybe it isn't hers to know. Maybe what matters is that she doesn't let this chance slip away.

At the Gull, she gets out of the car. She leans on the door. "Did you mean it?" she asks.

"Which part?" Nathan says.

"You said 'us.' You belong here with _us_. Did you mean it?"

Nathan very carefully doesn't look at Duke. "Yeah," he says roughly.

"What about you?" she asks Duke. 

Duke is flustered. "Nathan—"

"I meant it," Nathan says, and looks at him.

Duke turns red. He huffs a laugh. "I hope you know what the hell you're doin'," he says.

Audrey looks at them both. "Let's find out."

* * *

They go upstairs to Audrey's place, which is about as cold as you'd expect it to be in Maine in late October. The guys, also predictably, are painfully awkward about the whole situation. 

"It's freezing in here," Audrey says, crossing the room to the hearth where she starts building a fire. As she does, she glances back over her shoulder. "You guys gonna stand there all night, or is someone going to pour us a drink?"

"Drinks," Duke echoes, and claps his hands, the sound loud in the room. "That is an awesome idea."

"You are a bartender," Nathan says.

"I am! That is true. Drinks it is." In Audrey's kitchen, Duke finds a bottle of wine and makes himself busy opening it. 

Audrey gets the fire lit and burning steadily, then stands up. 

"You sure about this?" Nathan asks her, low.

"Maybe I should ask you that." Audrey looks over at Duke, who studiously pretends he has no idea they're talking about him. She lets out a breath, and gives Nathan a wry look. "But if we don't try, we're never gonna find out." 

Nathan's eyebrows agree with her.

Duke brings over the glasses and sets them on the coffee table, pouring one for each of them. When he hands one to Nathan, his color is high. Nervousness gets the better of him, and he hooks a thumb over his shoulder. "You know, I could just—"

Nathan stops him with a hand on his wrist. Audrey's heart jumps. She wasn't sure until right then that this was going to work—but the sexual energy in the room just leapt upward about a thousand percent, and her pulse is beating fast at her throat. "Stay," Nathan says. And then, to her surprise and Duke's, "We need you."

Duke looks over at Audrey, who smiles a little and nods encouragement. "What he said."

Duke takes a deep swallow of liquid courage, his eyes straying back to Nathan like he can't help himself. His right hand clenches like he wants to reach out, but he's scared to.

"Okay, so what do you want me to—"

Nathan pulls him in by the wrist and kisses him. 

Audrey, whose whole body feels that kiss down to where it counts, retains the presence of mind to take the glass out of Duke's hand and set it aside before he can drop it.

Her first thought is that Nathan is... really hot when he takes what he wants. Her second thought is, finally. Thank God.

Then she remembers what kissing Duke is like. How big he is, and how warm, and the feeling of all that strength being held back. It hits her that she did this, she actually made this happen—it's Disneyland and the Fourth of July, and she's going to get to have both of them, _together_ —as long as she doesn't screw it up somehow. 

But she can do this. She knows it deep down, in the place that always knew how to solve whatever insane situation Haven could throw at them. They're her boys, and they have been since the start. Compared to what they've already faced, this is nothing.

The kiss... it doesn't last that long, objectively speaking, but Nathan takes his time with it, and by the end Duke is visibly wrecked. Audrey's stomach clenches in sympathy. When Nathan finally lets Duke go, Nathan's eyes are a little glazed, too, but it's Duke Audrey reaches out to, laying a hand on his arm to ground him. It seems to give him the strength he needs to open his eyes, and he finds her gaze, his expression wide open and disbelieving.

"Hey," she says, smiling.

He lets out a breath as if remembering how. "Easy for you to say." His eyes slide to Nathan, and with her fingers curled against the inside of his bicep, Audrey can feel how fast his heart is beating. "This is... not how I saw this night going, I gotta tell you."

Nathan's voice comes rough and even lower than usual when he says, "If anyone here objects, speak now, or forever hold his peace."

"Yeah, not happening," Duke says, so fast that Nathan's barely finished his sentence. But then, more serious, he meets her eyes. "Audrey?"

"No objection here, believe me." She glances at Nathan, who's flushed in a way that only makes him more attractive. His eyes are so blue, she gets stuck there for a second. There's nothing more beautiful than Nathan when he's sure of himself, though Duke—flustered and happy and letting his sweet heart show through like he is now—comes close. Between the two of them, she has to be the luckiest woman on the planet. "You might have to pinch me, though."

"No objection to that, either," Nathan says, and Audrey's never loved that dry, teasing drawl of his more.

She takes a sip from her own glass and sets it down next to Duke's, then reaches out for Nathan's hand. "Thank you." Then she takes Duke's hand, too, feeling the familiar roughness of his skin. Nathan's fingers are warm, and he twines them with hers without thinking. "Both of you. For everything. I wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for you."

Duke's eyes are still wide and a little wondering as he drinks in her face, his lips parted. He really is criminally beautiful, she thinks, and maybe he's thinking something similar about her, because he squeezes her hand and pulls her closer as if by instinct. Then he stops, glances at Nathan, then back at her. "Can I—is this—?"

She exchanges an amused look with Nathan, then steps in close and reaches up for Duke's neck. Enough with the awkwardness; it's time they got this show on the road.

Even pulling him down, she still has to lean up a long way. It's easy to forget how big he is, and her head is full of images of him and Nathan together when she kisses him at last. It's been a long time since Colorado, but he tastes just as good this time, his mouth just as hot. He catches hold of her face, big hands cradling her jaw, and thoughts of Nathan and everything else fade for long seconds. 

Ready for it as she was, her breath catches; she might make a noise, she can't be sure. Duke kisses her again, deeper this time and slow, and her heart beats a fast bird-wing rhythm of surprised response.

She's breathless when he lets her go. _Okay then,_ she thinks, trying to get herself together. It's not like she didn't know she had feelings for Duke. It's not like this would even work if she didn't—she's not that cruel. 

Audrey realizes she's staring, and her face warms. Duke, of course, has already read her like a book, and there's a hint of smugness in his eyes despite the way his own breath comes fast, the way his color's gone hectic, too. "Been waiting a long time to do that," he says, like it's some kind of secret.

Bedroom eyes, Audrey thinks, not for the first time. As many times as she's read that phrase in her trashy pulp novels, it never struck her as anything but hyperbole until she met Duke Crocker, who might as well have invented the concept. Some part of her still feels like she's doing something naughty, thinking about him that way—which, if she's honest, was always part of the appeal, and she's sure she's not the first to feel that way about him. Maybe it's the same for Nathan. 

With that thought, she's aware of Nathan close by. She drops her gaze, glancing back over her shoulder. There hasn't been a time in the last two years when he wasn't there, solid beside her, backing her up no matter what. That hasn't changed, even though these days she's nobody special—any more than Duke's a superhero. Even though he doesn't need her any more to make him feel. 

Watching her with Duke still isn't easy for him—she can see that. The truth is that Nathan can feel everything and does, more deeply than anyone she's ever known. Troubled or not, he always could. Which makes it all the more remarkable that after all they've been through, he's made the choice to let go of his anger and his fear this way. It makes her love him more than she thought was even possible, and she squeezes his fingers, still twined between hers.

In the same moment, she knows what she wants tonight—what all of them need. For her and Duke, it's enough that they're here, alive and together. She already knows what she needed to; she knew up there on that bluff. Duke's relieved happiness is written all over him, like if he had to live on those two kisses for the rest of his life, he'd be good with that. But Nathan... 

She tilts her head and looks back up at Duke, speculative.

"Uh oh," he says. "I know that look."

"You told me once that you'd do anything for me. Did you mean that?"

His face grows serious. "You know I did."

"Bathroom," she says. "Medicine cabinet, top shelf."

He doesn't ask questions. When he's gone, Audrey turns back to Nathan.

"What about me?" he asks.

One corner of her mouth curves up, and she moves closer, stroking his chest and belly lightly through his shirt. "What about you?"

"Got plans for me, too?"

"More than you could possibly imagine."

"I like the sound of that."

Audrey leans up and kisses him, eyes closing as the taste and scent and feel of him washes over her, already feeling like home. At the same time, she slips his overshirt off, down his arms and away. His T-shirt follows. Nathan makes no protest, but she feels him shiver despite the fire's growing heat and presses closer to warm him up. His body is a little breathtaking, muscled arms and chest, slim waist, smooth skin and not an ounce of fat on him. Audrey slips her hands around his waist and runs them up his back, loving the feel of him, letting him get used to her touch all over again. He still kisses her like she's too good to be real—but he's learning.

"This what you were looking for?" Duke asks, returning with the bottle. 

"Bingo," says Audrey. At Nathan's look, she says, "You don't want to know how long ago I bought that."

"Good thing it doesn't go bad," says Duke. He gives Nathan an appreciative once-over, and Audrey can't blame him. The last year has been good for Nathan's physique, if nothing else. "You thinking what I'm thinking?"

"If you're thinking that someone here is long overdue for a serious massage, then yes."

Nathan groans faintly, though his color is high, and his eyes are hot. "You're gonna kill me, aren't you?"

"We're gonna give it our best shot," Audrey says. "That okay with you?"

"I'll try to survive it."

* * *

Within a couple of minutes, Audrey has them where she wants them. She had to override Nathan's half-hearted protests to get there, but now he's spread out obediently face-down on her sheets, a soft towel laid under him and a pillow supporting his forehead, the flush on the back of his neck betraying his self-consciousness. She let him keep his boxer-briefs, though she's not planning on letting that last for long.

It's one of her long-standing fantasies come to life, making up for all the touching he's missed—only this is even better. She's got strong hands, but Duke's are stronger, and bigger, and as she knows all too well, warm and gentle when he wants them to be. And he wants this, too; she knows that without having to think about it. She knows Duke well enough to guess that it's always driven him crazy that he could get under Nathan's skin in every way except one. She's seen the evidence of that more than once, in the way he did his best to provoke and irritate and harass Nathan into paying attention to him, into _seeing_ him. Now, Nathan is vulnerable to his touch for the first time in years, and she's given him permission.

She kneels on the bed beside Nathan and squeezes the scented massage oil into Duke's hands. She's still got her camisole and jeans on, unwilling to distract them before they've all had a chance to relax and get comfortable with each other. Duke is shirtless, too, and barefoot, but still wearing his cotton pants. She watches him warm up the oil and spread it between his palms.

"You okay with this?" he asks Nathan, his voice soft. Her heart aches a little for him, hearing how unsure he is of his welcome even now. 

Nathan raises his head a little. "I'm good. But hurry up before I change my mind."

She nods at Duke, and he sits at last on the edge of the bed and lays his hands against Nathan's back, above his waist.

The word that comes to mind at first is _reverent_ —but this is Duke, after all, and sensuality comes as naturally to him as breathing. It doesn't take long before he's drawing his hands up and down Nathan's back in slow, intimate strokes. When he's coated the expanse of Nathan's back and shoulders in the warm oil, she drizzles a little more onto Nathan's skin, and Nathan makes a sound deep in his throat.

Audrey slips her hand into Nathan's where he's curled it on the pillow. He squeezes her fingers as Duke begins to work at his muscles in earnest, with rhythmic circles and the deep, gentle pressure of his thumbs. Nathan's eyes are shut tight, his face a study in control, but Audrey can see that it's an effort for him. She and Duke can only imagine what it must be like for him after so long, to be touched like this—and by Duke, with whom he has such a long and thorny relationship. As for Duke... Audrey sneaks a glance and sees the all-too-obvious evidence of his feelings. She feels a melting heat as she thinks about where they're headed, and takes a deep breath to steady herself.

"Nathan," she murmurs, stretching out beside him on one elbow, and he turns his face toward her without opening his eyes. 

"Mm," he says. The edges of his control are starting to melt.

She brushes his hair back from his forehead, letting her fingers scrape gently against his scalp. She does that a few more times, and at last he opens his eyes. "You petting me?"

"Maybe. Is it working?"

Duke hits a particularly sensitive spot, and in answer, he gives a low grunt. "If I say yes, will you keep doing that?"

She says nothing, but brings his fingers to her lips and nibbles very gently at his fingertips. That gets his attention. She sees him watching her and holds his gaze with hers as she lets the tip of her tongue flicker out, sucking two of his fingers gently into her mouth.

He swallows. "Parker," he says, voice rough.

She loves the way he says it—always has—but it's never sounded so much like pure sex before. Watching him, she caresses the inside of his wrist as she sucks his fingers deeper into her mouth, learning the shape of them with her tongue. Duke has his fingers in Nathan's hair now, his palm stroking the back of Nathan's neck, and he's watching her, too. He strokes his fingertips lightly down Nathan's shoulders and the length of his back as Audrey sucks harder and lets her teeth scrape at the pads of Nathan's fingers.

Nathan outright groans, then, a low sound that sends a thrill of heat through her, and his eyes roll shut. "You are gonna kill me."

"No, we're not," Duke says, and leans forward to murmur it against Nathan's ear. "We've got plans for you."

At the heat of Duke's breath, the brush of his lips and the prickle of his mustache, Nathan shudders. "What plans?" he asks, breathless.

"Audrey?" Duke asks, his eyes closed now, his mouth teasing at Nathan's ear and neck. "What do you think?"

Audrey bites at the pads of Nathan's fingers one last time, then lets them slip out of her mouth. "I think we're gonna need less clothing."

That stops Duke for a second, and she sees the hitch in his breath, the way his pulse beats fast at his throat before he goes back to teasing Nathan with his mouth. "Sounds good to me."

"Not just yet, though. Don't want to rush this part."

Duke's eyes slit open and he meets her gaze for a second, then nods as if he understands. With some reluctance, he sits up and moves down the bed, squeezing more oil between his palms.

Audrey traces patterns over Nathan's shoulders while Duke starts to work on Nathan's calves and feet, taking his time. When she strokes between Nathan's fingers, he opens his eyes, watching her with a half-lidded, hungry look.

She leans in and murmurs, "Did you know the skin on your lips is the most sensitive on your entire body?"

"Where'd you hear that?"

She kisses him, taking her time, too; her eyes slip shut and she rests one hand against the back of Nathan's neck, their faces close together so that they can explore each other's mouths with their tongues. Time loses meaning for a while. She's aware of Duke watching them, of the strong, steady rhythm as he works all the tension out of Nathan's body—until something changes, and she feels a shudder go through Nathan. She breaks the kiss and lifts her head to see Duke's fingers have worked their way up to Nathan's thighs, straying close to intimate territory.

Nathan has goose bumps all over now, and she can feel him trembling with the effort to keep himself together. It's unbelievably sexy, seeing him start to come apart, but she doesn't want to torment him. There'll be time to go slow later. Audrey kisses him one last time, then pushes herself up to shed her clothes. At her look, Duke takes a deep breath and does the same.

Nathan half turns, pushing himself up on one elbow to watch as Audrey slips her jeans and panties off. It feels... inevitable, making herself naked for both of them, but she can't help the thrill of eagerness singing through her. She's wet from anticipation, and the way they both look at her makes her feel like the most beautiful woman who ever lived. She kneels back on the bed, and Nathan sits up to slip her camisole over her head.

His eyes are a deep, deep blue in the firelight. Gooseflesh making her nipples tight, she meets his gaze with a question: _you trust me?_

They've had this silent conversation at least a hundred times since they met, and the answer's always the same for both of them. Tonight's no different. It's the one thing she's counted on since the beginning, and like always, he doesn't let her down. Audrey touches his jaw in acknowledgment. Then she turns toward Duke.

Who is... really very naked. Audrey's pulse jumps, and she feels herself flush with sudden awareness. Her mouth goes suddenly dry as she lets herself look, all too aware of Nathan's eyes on them.

Duke doesn't say anything. Maybe they've finally done the impossible and rendered Duke Crocker speechless—anything's possible. But his eyes are wide, and she can see his heart beating at his throat. Audrey jerks her chin. "Duke," she says. "Get over here."

He doesn't need to be asked twice. And it's good when he puts his hands on her, still warm and slick with the massage oil. It's better when he kisses her—because if there's one thing Duke knows how to do, it's kiss like he means it—better still when she grabs hold of his necklace with one hand and pulls his ponytail's elastic free with the other, tangling her fingers in the soft curls, because that makes him forget to hold back and he pushes her onto the bed.

Nathan's with her. She doesn't have to see him to know it, but she feels him move to accommodate Duke between them. Duke is... a lot to deal with, his erection hot against her belly, his biceps solid under her hands, but Audrey is very much okay with that, and she feels the sudden and urgent desire to express that feeling with her tongue against his, which Duke does not seem to mind one bit.

"Audrey," Nathan says, his voice a rough growl that makes something inside her hum a deep _yes._ She doesn't stop kissing Duke—isn't sure she wants to ever stop kissing Duke—but when Nathan's hands find her waist, she goes where he wants her without thinking about it. 

Where he wants her is on top, which is fine by her, and seems like the best idea Nathan's ever had when she finds herself straddling Duke's hips, his beautiful dick between her legs and Nathan's arms around her, one hand on her hip and the other under her hair as he kneels up behind her, kissing the back of her neck. And then— oh—and then he proves that he really is the brains of this operation, spreading his hand against her belly and maneuvering her so he can shift her back and forth over Duke's hardness, her slick flesh slipping easily against Duke's, shocks of sudden pleasure coursing through her with each stroke.

Duke breaks free of kissing her with a choked sound, his hands going to her hips and gripping tight. He shudders, his eyes flying open, breath caught on a curse. They're both holding on to her hips now, a sweet push-pull between them. She wants more, but she also wants this to go on forever.

"Shh," Nathan says, his breath against her ear. Duke's eyes are on Nathan over her shoulder. "Just go with it."

"Always knew you were a sadist," Duke manages to get out. 

"Learned from the best."

"After this," Audrey pants, "you two are so gonna make out while I watch."

"Okay," Duke says, "but only if you make me."

"You are so full of it," Nathan says, and deliberately slows the motion of Audrey's hips until Duke clenches his eyes shut and swears again under his breath. It's working for Audrey, though, the slower pace starting to build the promise of a climax that she suspects will only begin to satisfy her.

The thought makes her shiver. "Nathan," she breathes, eyes slipping closed. She's aware that Duke is breathing deep, trying to make it last.

"I got you," Nathan whispers. He doesn't stop the gentle motion of her hips.

"Want you inside me."

"I know you do."

Duke's right. He's a sadist.

It goes on for what feels like a long time. She's close, eyes still shut, hands braced against Duke's shoulders and her thighs trembling, when Duke finally gets out, "Nate. Please. Have mercy."

"Audrey?"

"Yes," she manages. "Please, Nathan." She doesn't think she can stand it any more.

When he finally enters her from behind, she makes a sound she barely recognizes. It's echoed by Duke's groan of relief as Nathan's weight bears down against them, and Nathan's own choked-off, heartfelt response. Duke's cock is slick with his wetness and hers; he slides easily against her as Nathan pushes into her. She can't support her weight and Nathan's, not like that, but it's okay because Duke can. He catches her, pulls her down into his arms, and then Nathan begins to move.

It feels so good, Audrey can't catch her breath at first. She doesn't think she can come like this, the stimulation almost too much, but it's okay, it won't take much once they let her breathe. Being mashed between them is still a feeling she wouldn't trade for the world, and her heart's going a mile a minute in sympathy for the sounds Nathan's making, the way he feels inside her and the pressure of Duke against her stomach. He's close and fighting it, slick and hot against her skin, and she knows he's going to come moments before he does by his fierce grip on her hips and the unsteady, frantic way he tries to resist Nathan's relentless rocking motion.

"Come on," Nathan gets out, and that's all it takes. Duke comes in a sudden hot rush, gasping and swearing, _"Fuck, Audrey, God,"_ like the words are interchangeable. Nathan's not far behind, and Audrey shivers at the feel of him coming inside her. There's something primal about it—some part of her that knows this is the father of her child. It's not exactly a comfortable thought, but she's too far gone to care.

They hold on to her like that, both lost in their own pleasure, until Nathan finally regains the presence of mind to move. Audrey isn't capable of it; she's so overstimulated that her body doesn't want to cooperate, but luckily, after a moment, Nathan pulls out of her and helps her unfold herself to lie back against him. "Duke," is all he says—maybe all he's capable of himself—but it's enough.

Nathan kisses her then, touches her breasts, and Duke, with an obvious effort, makes himself move and buries his face between her legs. 

It's worth the wait. His tongue learns her with fervent enthusiasm, and the feel of his mustache and beard make it even better. Audrey thrusts up against him, breathing "oh, oh," as Nathan supports her weight, his hands spread warm against her ribs and his voice in her ear, whispering encouragement. She rests her head on his shoulder and mouths at his neck, tasting salt, until she can't stand it any more and shudders against Duke's wicked mouth. He's licking the taste of Nathan out of her like it's ambrosia, making sounds of pure pleasure that reach deep inside her; she reaches for him, tangling her fingers in his hair, and starts to come with a sudden, sweet clench that makes her cry out.

"So beautiful," Nathan tells her, and that's the last coherent thing she knows for a while, because Duke is... really good at this, and also _patient._

A long time later, she's on the cusp of a blissful stupor when Duke crawls up her body to kiss Nathan with her taste all over his mouth.

"Hot," she manages, though it's too much trouble to move so that she can watch them properly. Nathan makes a faint sound that might be agreement. 

"Go to sleep, Audrey," Duke murmurs.

A moment later, she does.

* * * 

Audrey wakes up warmer than she should be; it's cold, the fire long since out, and only the soft gray light of pre-dawn at the windows. But she's flanked by her guys, both of them naked and giving off heat like a furnace, and someone was smart enough to pull the bedclothes over all three of them before they passed out. 

_Good morning, Audrey Parker. Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life._

The thought's the same, but everything else has changed for the better. 

"I'll take it," she murmurs.

* * *

The weird thing is, it's not. Weird, that is. Maybe it's because it's Haven, and this was always meant to be. Maybe it's because they've been headed here for so long. Maybe it's kismet. 

"Next time we do this at my place," Nathan says as they're all pulling clothes on, shivering in the cold apartment. The smell of coffee brewing is small consolation for the unrelenting chill, and Audrey is seriously considering dragging them both back under the covers at gunpoint.

"My boat is warmer than this," says Duke.

"My place," Nathan counters. At Duke's look, he raises his eyebrows. "Bigger shower."

Duke grins, and points a finger at him. "I always knew you were the smart one."

"Your place it is," Audrey says, teeth clenched to keep them from chattering. "At least until next summer."

Nathan catches her eye in that way he has where he smiles without smiling, exactly. He says, "Sounds good to me."

It sounds good to her, too, and if the look on Duke's face is anything to go by, it's unanimous.

Audrey told Nathan once that she loved him, always had and always would. That hasn't changed. But she of all people knows that love isn't that simple, and it isn't something that ever really goes away. There's different kinds of love, and if she wanted to spend a lifetime figuring out exactly what box to put their feelings in—hers for Nathan and Duke's for her and whatever it is that binds Duke and Nathan together—well, she's got a lifetime, now, thanks to them. But she can think of better things to do with her time.

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the prompt, _Duke loves Audrey, Nathan loves Audrey, Audrey loves Nathan, Audrey is possibly in love with Duke, and Nathan realizes that he can't live without Duke as they are two sides of the same coin. Now the three must figure out what this means for them and where to go from here._
> 
> This was written after season 3, and I choose to believe that seasons 4 and 5 never happened. :)


End file.
